Some of you started reading this article because you’re hoping to find your perfect match to spend the rest of your life with. Some of you are reading this because you’re worried your current partner isn’t living up to what you had hoped for. But before you go any further, you must know this:
There is no perfect partner. And no perfect relationship.
However, psychologists have noticed that almost every marriage or relationship that stands the test of time has a few similar qualities. The truth is, as many long-time couples know, not every relationship started out “ideal”, but with time and committed effort, they became that way.
Here are the 7 qualities that an ideal life partner has. How many of these describe you?
1. The Ideal Partner has “Grown Up”
Now, this doesn’t mean that they’re boring and only have “mature” interests. The ideal partner is grown up in the sense that they’re not still dealing with any unresolved issues, fear, or unforgiveness from their childhood. They can recognize the patterns in their life, and have the ability to act outside of them when necessary. They don’t waste their time chasing the things they think their childhood owes them, and they don’t expect you to fill the needs of their past.
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2. The Ideal Partner is Honest
This is a big one. While almost everyone lists honesty as one of their top relationship priorities, not everyone actually understands what it means. The ideal partner values trust. And even more important, they’re willing to work at building that trust with integrity. No false pretenses. Not only that, their words can always be trusted. This means when they say yes, they mean yes and when they say no, they mean no.
3. The Ideal Partner is Open
Wait, isn’t that the same thing as being honest? Yes and no. Openness involves honesty, but it’s also about being willing to surrender any desire for power in a relationship. The ideal partner doesn’t feel the need to hide their weaknesses from you, or pretend that they’re perfect or better. Open people aren’t defensive, either. They’re not only willing to talk about their mistakes, but are more likely to learn from them, too.
4. The Ideal Partner has Respect
If someone has respect for other people, they actively try to understand others’ perspectives. They place a high value on other people’s interests and dreams, even when they’re different from their own. That’s why respectful people have freedom in their relationships. That is, both they and their partner feel free to enjoy life in the unique ways that they were meant to, and they know they can share special moments with each other.
5. The Ideal Partner has Empathy
When your partner is empathetic, they know you intimately, and take the time to understand who are you in every aspect of your whole self. This helps the both of you to communicate better, and learn to cherish your similarities. An empathetic person will learn to feel how you feel.
6. The Ideal Partner is Physically Available
You’ve heard about “emotionally available”, but being physically available is just as important. A healthy physical relationship involves being able to be openly affectionate with each other, through hugs, holding hands, even tickling! In addition, the ideal partner won’t bring fear and personal hang-ups into the bedroom. They realize that sex is made for both of you, and their behavior shows that it’s never just about them.
7. The Ideal Partner Can Laugh
Life can be really tough, sometimes. But an ideal partner can maintain a sense of humor and a positive outlook even when things get hard. If you can laugh with each other (with, not at) during an argument, then that’s a really good sign.
When each of these qualities is shared by both partners in a relationship, it has the best odds of being a long, happy, and healthy one. Whether you’re single and desiring a great relationship, or you’re already in one and want to make it better, think about each of these points, and be willing to improve over time. Not only will your partner thank you, but you’ll be grateful to yourself.
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