Posted on: June 25, 2020 at 8:56 pm

If there’s one thing that a lot of parents have in common, it’s that they love taking pictures of their children. Their cameras are constantly at the ready to capture all of the candid moments that our kids experience throughout their childhood, so they can have memories to look back on when they’re grown and gone.

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While having photos of your kids is wonderful, there’s one thing that often gets left out- photos of you. Moms everywhere are starting to realize that they’re missing photos of themselves with their children, and now they’re calling on their significant others for help.

Read: I Raised 2 Successful CEOs and a Doctor—Here’s One of the Biggest Mistakes I See Parents Making

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Dads, take more pictures of mom

Mom and blogger Sophie Cachia posted a candid photo of herself with her son that was taken by her husband on her Instagram page with the following caption:

“Dear Men, Take the photo. Take the god damn photo. We spend days capturing beautiful moments of you and the kids. So whenever you see one of us with our babies, a beautiful candid moment, take the bloody god damn photo.” [1]

She argues that mom is behind the camera so often that she can often be left out of family memories completely. Her post received an overwhelming amount of support from other mothers who have the same problem.

Another similar request was made via a Facebook post by motivational speaker and author Kayln Maree Schimpf, who urged men to take photos of their wives while they have the chance. Her post, which has now gone viral, asks men to take the photo regardless of what she looks like, or even if she tells you no.

“You may not think about it often, or at all honestly. But how many photos does she capture of you, of your family and of your life you’ve built. But when she is gone, those photos won’t show your children the woman who was behind the camera,” she continued [2].

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Schimpf urges women (and their significant others behind the camera) not to worry about whether or not they’re looking their best- whether their hair is messy, they have no makeup on, or they’re wearing a dirty old t-shirt. She points out that one day, when mom is gone, her children will not care about those things. They will only care about having those memories to look back on [2].

Read: Parental Burnout: Moms Need Equality In Raising Children, Self-Care, and Most Importantly, Massages

It Doesn’t Have to be Perfect

Cindy Gatewood also spoke up in a blog post for Motherly requesting that dads pull out their phones more frequently to capture candid moments between his wife and his children:

“I looked through my phone the other day and realized I have tons of pictures of my husband playing with our kids, but we don’t have many of ME with the kids. And it’s totally my fault. I’m either always behind the camera, or never want him take a candid picture of me.” [3]

She emphasised that too often women are concerned about the photo looking perfect. They have to have makeup on, the house has to be clean, or they have to be wearing a nice outfit, because of what she calls the “social media mentality”. 

We always assume that every picture we take has to be uploaded to Facebook or Instagram, where everyone will see it, but Gatewood points out that this does not have to be the case. Photos don’t have to be put on display, but they will be precious memories for the children one day when their mother is no longer with them.

“Take the pictures to show them the love she had for them. Take the pictures so they can always remember how silly she was. Take the pictures so they can see how beautiful she was. It doesn’t matter if she’s in her pajamas and on day four of dry shampoo, please, take the picture.” [3]

Take Photos of Dad, Too

Melissa Willets realised upon reading Schimpf’s post that not only does she not have many photos of herself with her kids, but neither does her husband- most of the photos are of the kids only.

While it’s wonderful to capture your children enjoying their childhood- to freeze those moments in time- it’ll be more valuable to them one day to have photos of their parents and not just of themselves.

Each of these posts, by Cachia, Schimpf, and Gatewood, are great reminders that in a time when everyone always has a camera in their pocket, too often we forget to capture the little moments. The messy moments. The non-curated, unposed, joyful moments in life that we will hold dear one day when our families are no longer together in the same way.

So moms, don’t be afraid to have your photo taken. Don’t worry about getting the perfect angle, or just the right setting, or having the right makeup on. When you and your kids look back on it one day, none of that will matter, but what will matter is the memory that you’ve captured that can be cherished for years to come.

Keep Reading: Moms, Here’s A Reminder You’ll Always Be ‘Home Base’ For Your Boys

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Brittany Hambleton
Team Writer
Brittany is a freelance writer and editor with a Bachelor of Science in Foods and Nutrition and a writer’s certificate from the University of Western Ontario. She enjoyed a stint as a personal trainer and is an avid runner. Brittany loves to combine running and traveling, and has run numerous races across North America and Europe. She also loves chocolate more than anything else… the darker, the better!

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